“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” Anthony Robbins
Conscious communication is essential in maintaining healthy and peaceful relationships. Almost all of us are looking to experience peace and harmony with both partners and friends. This requires a level of emotional connection that is more possible if the two parties each have an open and intimate relationship with themselves. I have found in my work with couples that they often seem to be communicating on different planes and when they are really able to meet each other in a place of mutual rapport, their connection is deepened or renewed. The disharmony is usually caused by unrealistic expectations of the other person and the relationship. When we communicate from our intellects, one person has to be right and therefore, the other wrong. This results in distancing between the two parties causing unhappiness and separation.
It takes courage to speak truth to each other about how we feel inside of our relationships. Men and women move around the truth attempting to not hurt their partner’s feelings by not expressing what they truly feel. This means that they have to suppress their true emotions which then go underground and work unconsciously often resulting in passive-aggressive behavior or disconnect. Many of us are uncomfortable with our own emotions and want to avoid feeling them at all costs. This ultimately wears down the connection as each person makes assumptions based on their own unresolved relationship with themselves. As time goes, each partner begins to project onto the other their own limiting beliefs and unprocessed emotions. This is a recipe for much pain and separation.
Truthful and open communication with each other allows a space for resolution of potentially harmful issues between two people. If the truth is left unspoken it will be suppressed and therefore begin to eat away at the fabric of the connection. Speaking the truth does not mean giving honest opinions of the other person. It means speaking from your heart about how you are feeling within the relationship and within your life. In order to speak from the heart it is important that you have developed a level of consciousness and that you are connected to your own emotional body so you can be aware of what it is you are truly “feeling” and not what you are “thinking” about what the other person did. Conscious communication allows you then to express these feelings in a way that opens up space between you for connection instead of causing pain that shuts each other down.
It takes courage to be open and vulnerable and a commitment from each partner not necessarily to stay together but to be present to each other at all times and to make decisions in the present moment about what is best for each person and for the relationship. Let’s break through the collective limiting belief that it is not possible to be happy, healthy and open within our relationships. Trust yourselves.
