It continues to amaze me as I sit with others each day listening to both their stories and their deeper feelings how capable we are of hurting each other. This hurt can have a profound effect on how we show up in our lives. There are many levels of betrayal depending on the closeness of your relationships and yet each time you experience pain, most of us have the tendency to shut down, move from the pain in our hearts to our intellectual minds. It is here that we believe we have some form of control and where we might be less vulnerable. Not true, we are still feeling the pain. It hurts to be betrayed by someone you love.
“If I could just understand why they did that to me, then I could let it go.”
“Why would someone who loves me treat me in such a way? I am a good person.”
“Did I do something wrong?”
“I must not be good enough.” (we know how many forms that can take on)
The list could go on because it is in our minds that we engage in this busy chatter as we attempt to get some form of understanding so that we don’t have to feel the pain of the hurt and betrayal. Meantime our hearts are breaking.
In each moment of our lives we have a choice of whether to shut down and protect or open up our hearts. This is not often easy especially in painful times. The natural tendency is to resort to our old patterns of protection when we feel pain or even the threat of it. This can play out in the polarities of life. We sometimes tend to drown in the painful emotions or suppress them and move forward without allowing ourselves to feel. Accessing courage at these times can give us the opportunity to heal the old patterns so ingrained deep within us. In our subconscious minds we make decisions to never allow ourselves to experience pain again and we begin the process of shutting down our hearts behind protective coverings. The conscious journey towards internal freedom is a vulnerable one because it calls for us to open up around our pain, both old and new, so we can live open hearted lives.
The intuitive open heart often knows things before our intellectuals minds catch on. I believe so strongly in living life trusting in that inner guidance as you all know. This practice does not keep us from feeling pain, quite the contrary. It is often more challenging to live this way because you are not suppressing your feelings. The promise of it is that we can experience a freedom within ourselves no matter what is happening in our lives. It is this promise and the commitment to move through life’s experiences present and open that allows me to trust that each life experience even the painful ones are an integral part of my unfolding. Can you allow yourself to move through your emotions to the Beauty of your Spirit and trust in your own deep wisdom. I want to.
Have a beautiful week. Try to be aware of how you impact or hurt others too so that we can create an environment of truth and openness. This is conscious living.
Love and Light, Marion